What Is Love?

There is this expectation within the human existence and especially within the Christian churches that loving actions and attitudes are without conflict. “That wasn’t a very loving thing to say (do),” is often said in reference to 1 Cor 13, the “Love” chapter. The Howard Jones song from the 80’s then comes to mind in asking the question, “What is love?”

In his song, Howard Jones suggests that love can exist in spite of the very doubt of that love. Don’t believe him? Consider that the whole Christian doctrine of salvation is actually predicated on a similar concept, “God loves us despite our ignorance or disbelief of that love.”

I love you whether or not you love me.
I love you even if you think that I don’t.
Sometimes I find you doubt my love for you, but I don’t mind.
Why should I mind, why should I mind?

Chorus
What is love anyway, does anybody love anybody anyway?
What is love anyway, does anybody love anybody anyway?

Can anybody love anyone so much that they will never fear,
Never worry, never be sad?
The answer is they cannot love this much, nobody can.
This is why I don’t mind you doubting.

And maybe love is letting people be just what they want to be?
The door always must be left unlocked,
To love when circumstance may lead someone away from you
And not to spend the time just doubting.

Lyrics for Howard Jones’ What Is Love? are from www.lyricsfreak.com.

The problems I see are a. that Paul’s description of love is not suggested as a measuring stick for external judgment of others by us, or even ourselves by others, but a reminder for internal reflection into one’s own motives, and b. that as Jones’ song suggests, love can exist despite the vacuum of doubt.

The self desires to justify itself by appearing more spiritual, more loving, more anything than anyone else. “Recognize ME!” it screams. The judgment of how loving an action is should be recognized in that vein. It might as well be said, “I’m much more loving than that!” Does that mean that love doesn’t exist in that person? At that point, I think we’ve turned “love” into simple demonstrations of approved behavior.

In response to the Corinthians’ attempts to show each other up and appear more spiritual than the Corinthian next to them, Paul suggests a better way. Now, Paul does not merely recommend a better way of competing to show how more spiritual they were, although I’m afraid that is how we’ve read it. Instead, Paul reveals each of the motives that has resulted in the competition in the first place. Sad, that we’ve continued in them in the effort to show ourselves more spiritual, more loving, going so far as to bind others, forcing them to accept our judgments of them in order for them to establish how “loving” they are.

The truth is that love is a messy thing, and not nearly so cut and dried as many people suppose.

Posted by: HarryTick™ on 24. June 2007, 08:47 |